I believe Alex, that it is what is the Crucifixion? (no i'm sorry, that is incorrect)

you never know true treachery til you find your Judas
the friend that kisses your lips then has you killed
i can't believe that it would be you who would have my skin peeled
a cheap shot to see what's on the inside
you're so tired of seeing what's (so) out (of style)
you once had my hand, but now you've got my head
every chance at friendship and communication are dead
i'm on a cross looking down, my last dying smile becomes a frown
even Jesus had more poise than this, but i fall apart when i feel your kiss
Christ never experienced this kind of love
female hands that fit like gloves
oh damned maiden, take these nails from my hands
let's fall asleep together, tomorrow we make plans

there's no I in team, but there is in indifference

So tell me now, spit it out
all those talks about losing our spines
and selling out
you coated my downfall in caramel
you said "this is heaven" but made my life hell
i stripped you apart to find that you have no guts
but now you'll have a few scars from all of the cuts
never have a girl around your arm when your heart's on your sleeve
you know she'll just break it and then she'll just leave
my hearts in pieces and i'm causing a scene
everyone these days reads blogs and magazines
they say i complain, but they're complaining
i'm so tired of every night spent explaining
i'm just telling the truth
it's not my fault you sgo so low and ask for proof
well that last message you sent is proof enough
when you said your ex hates you and you need love
well i gave you my best that i could give
i can't give alot cuz i really shouldn't live
this is true to me in my mind
i swear the things i feel you'd die if you find
maybe you understand, but don't say nevermind

the art of making love (or faking it)

Moving across your body is like walking through a field of land mines
I swear that's how i feel as i stare at your tan lines
the feeling of your skin beneath my fingertips
is just too much as i drag them across your hips
this is so serious, but i tell way too many jokes
but i can't laugh as our tongues are tieing up like ropes
i've got your head in my hands and your hair in my fingers
the night never ends because your smell always lingers

When you dance you shake your hips, but i think you're really just sinking ships

Fingers dance across the keyboard as inspiration strikes
imagination thrown away, come back another day
no time for what isn't real, only the things I can feel
i'm overflowing like the water in a suicide victim's tub
the words stick to the paper like glue
it's kinda like the same way i stick to you
just to avoid any debate about who's being "cliche"
i was doing fine by myself, you were just a delay

the ring on my finger vs. the ring around my neck

You know it's so hard to say i do when i don't
I've been the one making excuses and getting away (halfway)
I blackmailed myself to love you cuz there was no one else
then i fell for you and she came around
oh, don't make another sound
sometimes i just wanna shoot you
other times i just want you in my bed
to wake up to you
return from my relapse
you appeal to these emotions i do not have
i had them once then they shut off
oh, the way you make me cut off
no change or dollar bills can save you now
girl, those kisses are now kills
turn me on and beat me down
by the way, put your hands in the air
i've decided i'm going to shoot you
oh, you can't change how this goes
you should've thought before you sided with my foes

think twice before you say you love them

nursery rhymes or well-thought out crimes?

Baby, i'm posting old ideas into new blogs
I've been secretly feeding you li(n)e after li(n)e
Sometimes, you just know it's coming
Other times, it's a train masked by darkness
I've always owned your heart and soul (your ears and eyes as well)
Pay me attention, i'm poor
I can't stand the stares if it ain't from your eyes
I can't take the stairs if i can't look at the back of your thighs
it's about mini skirts and mischief when you're around
i wanna jump into this emotion and live there til i drown
At night, the city is lit up like your eyes
surely this is just a surprise
maybe even a dream
oh. this is a wonderful scheme
You almost had me going
I just noticed, your clever mind is showing
Girl, this is just the beginning
This can't be a story without an ending

Thoughts collected at 3 p.m. on Sunday

It's daytime now and the thirst for chaos has long been subdued.
Now a hunger for food has set in.
Sometimes, we forget control and indulge ourselves to surplus.
We gather calories and fat and become something we look at in disgust.
I look at myself in this same disgust.

A second in my mind

Night time overhead and my mind halfway expecting disaster.
We crave it sometimes to keep us awake or wake us up.
Bullets, or blood, or giant monsters, something to shake it up.
Oh, in shaking it up, we fuck up.
Let's keep our heads to ourselves and let these thoughts wander.

a blog from the inside of the house of the dead

I feel so out of reach

i'm in wonderland

the sickness has cut me off

from the world and from anyone who counts

conversation feels stale

i'm starving for a cure, but craving this attention

medics and magicians, there is no help

i am making up for the disasters i have caused

a couple days and i'll be back to myself

i feel like a corpse back for revenge

craving redemption, i'll kill those who try to stop me

I should have erased that last message

Welcome to my world, you're at the core baby girl
In this place of writing
where everyone writes the right things
Let me explain
You're the blood in my veins
You're the reason why it rains
Sooo long hun this has been so fun
I hope you take the next train back
You've been the cause of many panic attacks
My heart, removed and my brain, these conversations lack
Midnight withdrawals and morning pills
It's amazing "just look at his writing skills"
The bystanders open wide
The actors all rehearse to find out the director lied
No movie, no magic, no love, oh how tragic
She screamed "MURDER!"
God, you should've heard her
Those noises make my throat run dry
My fever's running (away from me)
Oh how cunning (can he be?)
Just believe, pretty boys can deceive
I want gold in the form of kisses
I.O.U.s written to my misses
I'll see you when i wake up
Too many twists to make up
Tonight, this bed is full of hope
Keep secrets and tie yourself a rope

Infidelity and Switchblades

I'm the black line around your eyes
I'm the bluest part of the skies
In my love for you, I lost myself
In losing you, I have no one to help
I've forgotten how to get back to being me
These one times emotions have turned into seas
We can dance dance because we've fallen apart
This is the way you love, now misery loves me
Cliche'd and second best, atleast I'm well dressed
This is without a doubt the sexiest lie I've ever told
"I wanna feel this way about you until i grow old"
I remember when that was because I was in love
Now everytime i think about you, my heart sends out a shove
It's a nudge that says you should forget her
and I know i really should, the conversations we had are now a blur
Dear St. Saturday, these doors are open ended
I read about the afterlife, but i never really lived (and still can't without you)
Delete my number and block me out of your mind
Baby girl, there's no one else like me that you will ever find
XO from the top of my lungs
My heart just collapsed and I just swallowed my tongue

Decisions so deep they call them incisions

You said you weren't waiting forever
I only made you wait a week but you just couldn't
You were sending traitor signs behind my back
I was wrapped around your finger like a ring
now i'm wrapped around your neck like a sling
Baby don't throw deuces, just tie nooses
No more burning bridges or crashing cars
Let's start new baby girl
I loved you then and always will
There's a hole left in my heart only you can fill
Nothing else, no lie will fit
I only tell lies and that, i'll admit
But i can never say I don't love you
It tears me apart when I think of you with him
It rips my mind to shreds when I think of you two in bed
Oh, I think I just fell to pieces when I heard your voice
Baby, I'm dying to be with you and this isn't by choice
You are my anti-drug, the reason i keep myself clean
It hurts me as much as you when I think of what i did
I'll say i'm sorry til I'm dead, when i forget all the other words in my head
From the deepest part of my black heart, I need you

Everything you shouldn't do (the guide on how to)

I have the misfortune to taste the distortion in truth
this is breeding lies, it's time for an abortion
I can't feel the sockets of my eyes
I can't see anything but i'll sure try
This is one thing that will not die
This is a promise, my hands will end this
Dawn's dying sighs paint pinkish cloudy skies
The sun forgets the moon, but will pass her soon
That's me and you my love
Everything between us is a gentle shove
This is love lying in misery
I am an organic mystery
I'll never understand a word i say or a move i make
God, count that clock down til i break
I WILL BREAK
I'M A FAKE
DRAG THE LAKE
SKIN THE RAKE
HIT THE BRAKE

Models of the macabre, give me false information and explicit scenes of gore

Unloaded, Unloved
A chamber in a heart
rather than a gun
Not afraid to love
just afraid to lose
She's gone
The losses add up to one
I lost the battle
Can the war be won?
The Patron Saint of Liars and Fakes
The Prince of Regrets and Mistakes
My last secret left alive
My last goodbye gone unsaid
All this and more in the letter she read
My name signed at the bottom, oh we've hit rock bottom
Cut the cords and leave your love at the door
I just can't forget the way you told me
You said "I love you" but you lied
I said "I love you", then woke up and cried
Something almost hard fills the air
Oxygen becomes concrete (lies)
My skeleton becomes a machine
I'm set on repeat, and stuck on skipping the beat
Thoughts set on overdrive, an overkill of the truth
I've become an exaggeration of everything you loved
Loneliness fits around me like a noose
Sometimes beauty lies in the ugliest things
Scenes of senselessness coat the eyes of amazing
I am not this, but something more
I gave up back when i wasn't still a whore
My heart is more like a cell
The lovers inside can only wait to be freed
I'm a sucker for hearing them plead
I love you means more like let me breathe
Choking on veins wrapped around my throat
My unability to speak, left in a note
Blue faces painted on the outside
She only sees the hopeless man within
I need this rescue now
Tonight, the titanic will sink
Beauty will go out with a bang